Are you there, Patriarchy? It’s me, Women.

Hey Patriarchy!

Are you listening? We have something to say:

Fuck you.

Did you not hear that because it was too shrill?  Let’s try again:


Was that harsh? Well, we’re sorry but we need to make sure you are paying attention.  Time to put your big boy pants on and listen up.

We know you might be feeling pretty good right now as your petty, Kraft cheese slice colored Twitter ghoul managed to harness your powers of Misogyny (and the powers of your equally ugly brothers in arms, Racism and Bigotry) to carve out some breathing room for you.  You will use this to say that you are strong- but the reality is you are hiding a secret- you are afraid. You are afraid that eventually we will win.  You are right to be afraid.

On November 8, you won a battle.  We know this war is long and your shit is old and tired. One day our children will look at you like a rotary phone or a VCR- something useless, heavy and irrelevant that no longer has a place in the world.

We have suffered a set back but we will not let you reset the course.

You will seek to legislate our uteruses. You will pay us less for doing the same job as a man. You will punish us professionally for taking time to care for our children.  You will try to teach our girls that they have more value when they show their bodies but shut their mouths. You will treat consent as though it were an ambiguity. You will interrupt us, speak over us and then claim our ideas as your own. You will assault us and then ask us what we were wearing or how much we had to drink.

You will find a thousand different ways to make us feel that we are weak. Dude- we push babies out of our vaginas on the regular- we know that we are not weak.

On Tuesday night, you did not pour concrete on a glass ceiling. You poured steel into our spines.  Everything we have gained- the right to vote, access to higher education, reproductive rights, a place in the governing bodies- we have gained not because you gave them to us, but because we wrestled them from you. We moved inch by painful inch. And we will keep moving. We move upward on each other’s shoulders and on the shoulders of our past champions.

Our movement may have been slow and might be slower still, but in this story, we are the tortoise. We think you know how it ends (spoiler alert: a jackass hare with small paws and a “bigly” ego who can’t keep his mouth shut gets schooled).

We will not let this go. We are watching. We are linking arms. We are not waiting. We have our pantsuits on, we are getting in formation and we are coming for you. And yes, you should be scared because individually and collectively, we are such a nasty woman.

And BTW- we hereby put you on notice that we are taking back the word “p*ssy”.  It no longer has any power for you. We own it. Just like eventually, we will own you.



2 thoughts on “Are you there, Patriarchy? It’s me, Women.

  1. WestminsterT

    Great stuff. I am angry like you. I get what happened now, and the GOP won because they were smarter than us. They understood how to harness the most anger. Trump had many many many women voters and vocal supporters.

    I think Hillary got a totally raw deal. And I also think sexism had a lot to do with it… but not everything. She was the right choice for sure, but not the right time, I’m afraid. And that bugs the shit out of me. How the fuck should she have to pay for Washington corruption to the benefit of the GOP? That is the greatest scam of all time! But, that was the race she entered. Unreal!

    I worked with a woman who threatened to slit her wrists if Hillary didn’t win in 2008. This was not mostly about keeping women down. You are waaaaay smarter than me, and I would vote for you any day. Just don’t run when they are rebelling against cool chicks. I totally have male sex organs, but I am completely on your side. Hard to be part of the Patriarchy sometimes…


      I hear you 100% on the scam of the whole situation- the Republicans broke the government, created a gridlock and blocked any social/progressive change or programs that would benefit the underemployed and unrepresented and then some pervy snake oil salesman was able to harness that along with unleashing the alt-right in order to sail the Republicans to victory in the House, Senate, Oval Office and ultimately the Supreme Court. We now just hope that we see a turn around in the mid term elections two years from now. Also, you can have a penis and not be part of the patriarchy 😉

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